Grey and Blue

Outside is bright like
ice crystals falling through a river of sparkling sunlight
The brisk wind tears at my clothes
trying to access my heart which is
oh so tightly bound, deep in my chest.
So deep like
in a cave those slippery silent rivers of dark water
sliding inconspicuously through walls of ancient stone.           My heart is old and soft like those
                                                                                                                         crying cavernous depths
                            My mind is lost in the black night
                            not a scary night, no... A close night.
        I think
that if you open your eyes
Like on the rainy days when the sun slowly
pokes out for a teary glance at the wind-blown world

If you opened your eyes             all the lonely black rock would go away
   like fog on a steamy Sunday morning
                  And my eyes would be grey again
your eyes are like the lakes so blue
So deep blue
They call me beautiful.  

Winter Words

I cannot write
My words are small and comfortable
inside my chest behind my heart
Slow and content just sitting there
Warming themselves by the fire of my soul
typed hands stretching toward the heat
Those words
remember the dark ocean in his eyes
and the soft grip of his fingers
Anchoring my heart
So that many waters
don't wash away my love.

Hush

I open my window really wide
so all the wind comes in
And crashes through my room, making
the ghosts shudder and whisk away into the corners
where the shadows stand still and dark.

I watch the streetlights spill
slippery stripes of silver on the sidewalk
where cursing silhouettes dodge and dash
between cold splashes of cloud tears.

I climb up in a high tree,
get all shivery and rained-on
with black leaves slapping my arms
And great envelopes of nighttime landing
in my lap.

Then I huddle back
my hair drips and my fingers are lost in an iceberg,
my nose froze more than Alaska
But my smile is stitched on with puddly permanency.

I wink at the ghosts before
I fall asleep.

Tenderly Breathe

You come and Go
                                mmm...like a moth.
Satin eyelids wings so soft and gently fluttering
                                                                                       velveteen darkness in chocolate pools
                                                                                                                                                            your eyelashes damp
with haunting tears.       That fragile sincerity in your
                                                                                                  fathomless midnight eyes. So dear.

oh...when time is a madly racing minuteman                 and quakings of the soul are lost.far behind,
                         I will
                                    bath again in the melting ache of love
                               flood the nooks of my heart with purest gold
                   I will caste my imperfect angel wings around Your breaking,
                                          hold you together till the opal moon, when you are strong
                                                            again.  

ICU

                             Back in the darkness
                                                Clean reassuring sterile
                                                                       Smelling like gentle citrus
                                      The world may be upside down but
                     this room is okay.
         Soft smiles and fragile voices
                                            which call quietly to God in heaven:
                                                                                                                heal me.
                                                     Eyes are staring wide but sleepy
                    Shadowed with empty memories
    Her face is so lovely and she is sad
                                                             don't worry.
                                                                     Hands are warmer than the piled sheets
                                                     comforting. The night
is so very long it seems to never
                              end footsteps coming and leaving speaking words
                                                                                  of patient love they cannot know why
                                                    Each heartbeat is a victory.

Be Safe

That ripping sound
my heart is breaking
For you, O Dearest Love
In your grasp I am standing
afraid to leave you
Lest the world catch
and haunt you, O Fragile One
Eyelashes glittering with salty diamonds,
you sigh against my hand
and cling to life
This frightening reality you
are so reluctant to reenter.
Weep, O heavenly behemoths,
shed your grey sorrow on the thirsty ground
The world must mourn tonight.
For even all my tears
can't show my sorrow.

Holding on to You

There are so many stars in the sky
so bright they blind me    from so far away
There are so many drops of rain falling
so cold my heart may stop      so heavy my eyelids close
There are so many pains in my soul tonight
so deep they tear me apart    I am so afraid

Where is my savior
          To whom do I turn when  the darkness
             of death is suffocating me
                     
Did he forget me


In your chest      blood is pumping
Your heart is still alive and full
In your fingers     you can feel me
You are still the one I know

Despite how far    I feel     I'm falling
Fear is not
      alone
Near my scared and broken spirit      is hope

holding on
   to you.